Dear Weird Al,

Do you know what everyone can relate to, but nobody has ever written a song about?

Cake fails.

Do you know what solves almost all cake fails?

Whipping cream.

Just in case you wanted to right this wrong and write that song, here is some inspiration, by way of Coldplay’s, “Fix You.”

Sincerely,

Campfire Tales

When the store bought crust doesn’t hold it’s shape
When the cake you flipped flops off the plate
When the sugarless pie starts to quake
Don’t stress, no fear

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something, you can’t replace
When you bake a cake, but it goes to waste
Help is soon here

Fresh whipped cream hides flaws
And covers faux pas
Don’t cry, spread some fix goo

~ Camp Host Chad (and Coldplay)